Monday, May 6, 2013

Jack Chick's 'Dark Dungeons' tract is becoming a movie, and it will be awesome thanks to this Kickstarter

If you've ever gone shopping south of the Mason-Dixon line, chances are good that you've stumbled across a Chick Tract.

These black-and-white bundles of hate are the work of fundamentalist Christian Jack T. Chick and are famous for their racism, xenophobia, and intolerance to just about any subculture or hobby that Mr. Chick finds distasteful.

After blaming Catholics, Muslims, Family Guy, H.P. Lovecraft, and - I kid you not - the imagined war against Thanksgiving - for the decline of "traditional" Christian values, it's no surprise that Mr. Chick has earned a fair number of enemies and detractors (many of whom are sane Christians) in the course of his illustrious 53 year career as an illustrator.

But recently, Mr. Chick found a totally serious and in-no-way-satirical supporter who purchased the rights to turn his anti-RPG tract 'Dark Dungeons' into a movie... and it will be awesome.

With tongue planted firmly in cheek throughout the above Kickstarter video, author JR Ralls makes it abundantly clear that he's going to parody the hell out of this infamous comic that blames Dungeons & Dragons for leading impressionable young players to embrace Wicca... which then apparently allows them to control people's minds and force them into committing suicide.

Having played D&D for the better part of 10 years, I can't help but feel somewhat robbed if Chick's take on D&D is true.  The best thing I have to show for my hobby is a great group of friends and a collection of obscure plastic gaming dice (some of which light up!) Mind control powers would be pretty sweet...

...but anyway!  Dark Dungeons: The Movie is totally happening since its Kickstarter campaign shot past its funding goal but Ralls isn't done yet. If he can drum up an extra $3,000 in the next 18 days, he'll add a live-action rendition of Chick's anti-Cthulhu tracts "Why we're here" and "Who will be eaten first?" to the Dark Dungeons project.

This will, for the record, make Ralls' project the most comprehensive anti-anti-gamer parody piece funded to date, and will finally replace the anti-D&D opus Mazes and Monsters as a gaming group's Friday night drinking movie.