Tuesday, February 25, 2014

Object of geek desire: a portrait of you getting choked by Darth Vader

It might be hard for the internet age to accept, but fan fiction is not an altogether new phenomenon.

For as long as movies, TV shows, and medieval morality plays have provided fans with fleeting glimpses at imaginary worlds, these fans have longed to step into that space and live their lives with their favorite imaginary characters.

This week's Object of Geek Desire might not help fans live that dream, but it will allow them to hang the experience over their mantlepiece.

Yes, that's right - now you can be painted into Star Wars with this custom Etsy listing by the talented FeatherStonePortrait.

The way it works is simple - take a picture of yourself feigning a choking fit, email it over to the painter, wait three weeks, and you'll soon have a oil painting of you getting choked by Darth Vader.

While the premise and end result are both admittedly cool, I can't imagine many people would part with $575 dollars to immortalize themselves in such a pose unless they're *really* into A New Hope... or, y'know, erotic sci-fi asphyxiation play.

Still, the "Be painted into Star Wars" portrait will easily win points for the most creative portrait hung in the family room, and you can even surprise them with paintings of Darth Vader choking them for their birthdays... if you're fast enough to catch your friends and loved ones sleeping!

If a high quality Vader choke isn't your thing, FeatherStonePortrait can also paint you as a conquering Thor, a zombie couple, G.I. Joe's Destro (yes, Destro...), a sea captain, or a civil war soldier.

FeatherStone also does custom work on request, which makes her pretty much the only shop out there who's ready and willing to painting a picture of you as a sea captain being choked out by Darth Vader.

And they say portraits are a dying art...